In most parts of town, when your neighbors suck, you ignore them or call the cops. In Beverly Hills, you write them a condescending note and buy them champagne. Over at LAist, two anonymous neighbors of a woman they describe as a chain-smoking "banshee" decided that they were sick of overhearing her very audible, near-constant "wailing" on the phone. "This woman just drones on and on ... about some new misery that's befallen her or person who has wronged her, and always shouting these conversations out her window," huffed one neighbor (in fairness, at least one of the letter-writers works from home). Fed up, they chipped in to passive-aggressively buy her some champagne and sent it over with a snide letter, alerting her to the fact that yes, they could hear every single word of her conversations, and begging her to stuff her whine-hole with some bubbly. Smart move: people who drink entire bottles of champagne alone usually do get quieter and less depressed!