Welcome to Curbed Comparisons, where we explore what you can rent or buy for a set dollar amount in various Los Angeles neighborhoods. Is one man's studio another man's townhouse? Let's find out! Today's price: $1,200.
↑ Los Feliz: what it lacks in parking, it makes up for in overpriced bistros and boutiques. For a mere $1,150 a month, you can live in this "nice" 450-square-foot studio, located within a thetan's throw of the Church of Scientology's Celebrity Centre. You can also purchase the previous tenant's IKEA furniture for $400, a savings of -$200 on its original purchase price.
↑ This "cozy" single advertises itself as being "just steps from the Chinese [Theater]" in Hollywood, the laughable implication being that living in close proximity to violent SpongeBob SquarePants impersonators is somehow a selling point. The furnished unit, going for $1,100, comes with a full-sized bed, tube television, air conditioner, and–-wait for it--microwave! Flexible leases mean that, once your parents decide to stop financing your delusional dreams of "making it" in Hollyweird (sic), you can move back home to Duluth with ease!
↑ The gentrification of Highland Park continues with this one-bedroom unit in a newly-remodeled, rent controlled building from the '20s. The tastefully spartan pad, renting for $1,195 comes complete with hardwood flooring, marble countertops, recessed lighting, and your very own parking space. Best of all? Judging by the photos in the ad, it can accommodate a mattress on the floor, ensuring you maintain your hip, bohemian ethos.
↑ Ah, Venice. It's like a Whole Foods ... you can live inside of! For $1,199 a month! This unspeakably small, 250-square-foot studio includes access to a private shared yard, which is presumably 10 times as large as the studio itself. But you'll hardly be in the place, what with it being mere blocks from the beach and all. YOU'RE PAYING FOR CONVENIENCE HERE, OK?!?
↑ If you've ever lived above a pot smoking lunatic who likes to play bong-rattlingly loud dance music at all hours of the day and night (ahem), you might appreciate the fact that this unit "requires a specific type of tenant," a "quieter" one "who actually cares about the comfort of their neighbors." So if you're not a selfish asshole, you can totally pay $1,200 a month to live in this vintage (circa 1897!) junior one-bedroom apartment, with an O'Keefe & Merritt stove, near downtown Pasadena. Enjoy your huge windows, high ceilings, and swimming pool–-you earned it, good neighbor! --Megan Koester