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Million Dollar Listing Recapped, Ep 4: Party Foul

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This week's recap should be short, because yet again nothing really happened. The plot contrivances of Josh Flagg's blonde twinterns continues, and we're finally allowed to see Madison's assistant Heather meeting Josh Altman, which promises to generate sparks later on in the season. And there's some stuff about real estate, too.

Madison Hildebrand continues to work on the sale of the Malibu property owned by his friend, and prominent boob doctor, Dr. Shah. In an attempt to get more foot traffic into the house, Madison hosts a caravan of realtors driving up from Beverly Hills in a party bus. They've also chopped the price from $5.695 million to $5.5 million, after the house failed to generate any interest. As part of the caravan, Josh Flagg and his twinterns tag along to see what's available in the Malibu market. This presents a great opportunity for Madison and Josh to get their required face time. Unfortunately, these two just won't fight the way the producers were hoping. Nary a hair pull or angry word to be had. These two might as well be pieces of driftwood bobbing up and down in the ocean.

Later, at a private showing generated by the caravan, Madison meets with a couple who have an accident prone baby. Said baby can run through glass doors and roll into the ocean at any moment. The home continues to generate little interest, so Madison holds out hope that the couple will get over their fear of baby death and scoop up the beach house. While waiting for an offer, Madison gets a sexy massage to relax himself. This was the gayest thing ever, which is saying a lot for Million Dollar Listing. During the massage, Madison receives a text from the deathwish-baby-couple's agent with an offer of $5 million. Madison groans in disappointment - and unbridled passion as the masseur works his strained muscles. Madison immediately calls Dr .Shah to discuss the low ball offer, while the camera lingers on the hunky masseur's hands kneading Madison's flesh. The touching of man flesh continues as Madison and Dr. Shah agree to reject the low-ball offer and present a counter offer.

Later, Dr. Shah tells a relaxed looking Madison that his base price is $5.3 million. Madison sits with Dr. Shah and calls the buyers agent, presenting a counter offer of $5.35 million. The buyers counter the counter offer with $5.15 million, which is still too low. Madison proposes a creative counter offer, with a final price of $5.3 million, and the replacement of bathroom windows that the buyers didn't like. The clients agree to the deal and the home is sold. A happy ending for everyone!
Josh Altman begins this week's episode by trolling for new business at a local nightclub. He swaggers into the club with his posse of douchebags and conveniently meets a fellow clubbing realtor, Jimmy Quill, who Josh A describes as an 80's rock star realtor. In the past, they've partnered up to sell "millions of dollars" of real estate and listen to Bon Jovi tapes in Jimmy Quill's Trans-Am. While totally partying like rock stars, Jimmy Quill presents Josh A. with the opportunity to co-list the former almost-Jimi Hendrix-owned estate in Topanga Canyon (Jimi had been in escrow on the property at the time he died). The home located at 21423 Colina Drive (previously featured on Curbed), was designed by Harry Gesner, and features 4,682 square feet of all circular rooms, with 3 bedrooms, 4 baths, located on two acres of usable land. The property has the added benefit of being zoned for horse keeping. The downside is that the house hasn't been updated since the Brady Bunch was in its original run. The appliances and sink are a swinging 70's avocado green color. After a tour around the house, Josh A. speaks with the seller who agrees to list the home just below two million at $1.995 million. At a private showing, we're introduced to potential buyer Gretchen Bonaduce, Danny Bonaduce's ex-wife and wannabe reality-TV starlet. Gretchen is horrified at the home's dated look and labels it "tacky." After failing to move the house, Josh and Jimmy strategize at a cowboy bar, and decide to push the horse keeping aspect of the property rather than the dead rock-star angle.

The Josh Flagg sideshow continues this week with a focus on his continued attempt to sell the Suzanne Somers-adjacent home at 9346 Readcrest in Beverly Hills. In his latest gimmick, Josh plans an evening open house that will bring in a younger Hollywood crowd of promoters, restaurant owners and skanks. Josh leaves the party prep and promotion to the twinterns as part of his continued hands-off mentorship. The party goes well, and the owners seem pleased. In an aside, Josh explains that he's trying to push the home as a Hollywood party pad, and gimmicks like the late-evening party will help to create this perception. The party does generates one lead, with a young couple interested in the house. However, they're only interested in leasing the house, as they are tied up in Hawaiian real estate at the moment and can't even think of buying until they free up some of that money. Josh and his clients propose to lease the property for $12k per month, with the condition that they are allowed to continue showing the property to potential buyers. The young couple agree to the lease arrangement and alls well that ends well.

Highlights

Josh Altman: In this episodes main subplot, Josh Altman and Madison's assistant heather meet at Josh Flagg's open house party. They flirt and eye bang. Madison pushes Josh A. to ask Heather out. Subsequently we learn that Josh A did ask Heather out, which as the season's previews show will result in some sort of douchey drama later on.

Josh Flagg: "It's a party house, so we're going to party."

Josh Flagg: Introduces us to the term "shidduch", which according to Wikipedia is "a system of matchmaking in which Jewish singles are introduced to one another in Orthodox Jewish communities for the purpose of marriage." And now you know.