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Tesla CEO Says Downey Is Awesome, But It's Just Not Ready For Awesome Right Now

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From: Tesla
To: Downey
Subject: Downey is Awesome

Hey Downey, you're awesome, you know that, right? I totally intended to go steady with you all year, but the night before Fremont and I hooked up, I found out that Fremont's parents have a pool. And, well, it's almost summer. I was definitely going to call you before I showed up with Fremont to the big press conference, but some jerk (probably Jeff) leaked the news and it was all over Facebook before I could let you know. For that, I am very sorry. Downey, you are seriously the coolest. You're into Weezer and Kids in the Hall, and your parents always give me the best snacks when I'm over. I did exhaustive due diligence and found no meaningful problems with you at all. I loved you, Downey, from the moment I first met you, and I'm gonna tell all the junior guys that you'd be a great city to do business with, ok? And if I ever get into electric jets, I will totally call you. [Musk via the Telegraph]
· Elon Musk writes open letter to Downey [Downey Patriot]