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The Catch: How's Your Chi?

Delving into the bowels of Craigslist, The Catch features everything-looks-good-except listings. Submissions to the tipline here.

What/Where: This reader-submitted listing is not offering free rent in exchange for acts still outlawed in less enlightened places like Georgia. No, this time we're looking at an "apt wanted" listing for those of you seeking tenants.
Looks Good, Right?: Um. Well. Hmm. We suppose that all depends on your tolerance for yoga-practicing, raw food-eating, energy-vibrating actresses and writers. Ours is low. Very very low.
The Catch: Well, see above. But in their own words: Light, bright and beautiful best friends seek hillside sanctuary in exchange for high vibrations, healing energy, laughter, inspiration, raw food, yoga and fun. we are an actress and a writer/artist seeking sanctuary fitting of the energy we emanate. we are generous of spirit and talent and skills and love (divine, not dirty). on the verge of manifesting the millions coming, we are currently seeking a creative arrangement in which we are safe and comfortable and nurtured in exchange for the many aforementioned qualities and ?????? (we're very open). we seek a bright and airy shelter surrounded by trees and green, hopefully with a garden in which we can dig our hands and plant some seeds and feed our intended family with all the ooey, gooey organic love we want. we practice yoga every morning. we meditate daily. we infuse positive energy into our every moment. we vibrate love and light and yes and now and we are so looking foward to meeting you. xoxoxoxxoxoxoxxoxox" Yes, this is exactly why people hate Los Angeles.
· Light, bright and beautiful best friends seek hillside sanctuary [Craigslist]