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EaterTastings: Another Burger Please, Hold the Ketchup

[Renderings of new Father's Office from form environment research]

We're starting to hate our little sister Eater LA, who gets to hang out with celebrities in Aspen. All we get is trips to Skid Row to hang out with smack addicts. Where is the justice we ask?

1) Culvery City: We love, love, love the Father's Office burger and beer selection. But the metaphoric price is often too high to pay. Waiting on line outside? Circling seated diners in a game of musical chairs? (Does that couple look like they're about to leave? Did they just sit down? What ARE they doing?) So we've been looking forward to the new Father's Office coming to Culver City. Bigger. Better. With a patio! We're sold. Please stay on track for a July opening.

2) Los Angeles - We kind of have a crush on Chris Jacobson, the 6' 8", one-testicled, LA-based chef on Top Chef. Is that so wrong?

3) West Hollywood - We liked the old Norman's on Sunset and were sad to see it go. Especially their Friday night Pig and Paella special. They were even kind enough to offer us offal from the pig when we asked. So we're already biased against Crudo, which is taking over the Norman's space. You have big (pig's) feet to fill, Crudo.

4) Santa Monica - Gay men, quail wrapped in bacon and Sally Field should clearly never mix.

5) Brentwood - Every time a restaurant in a strip mall in Brentwood shutters, an angel gets its wings a restaurant opens somewhere in Hollywood.